Lady Adventure

Today the Mary Sue is featuring The Ten Most Successful Failures in Geekdom, and you will never guess who made the list!

I can only assume the factual errors in the first paragraph (Torchwood STARTED the Battle of Canary Wharf; Torchwood 3 has been around and failing for at least 100 years...) are a spirited attempt at solidarity. Also, it's kind of hilarious they only have examples from the first eight episodes or so. What, the time Torchwood BROKE THE RIFT, started an apocalypse, and released a ten-story demon in the middle of Cardiff wasn't worthy of inclusion? And that's only the first series!

Torchwood can out-fail anyone.

The new Torchwood poster!



1) ::refrains from making obvious comments about who accidentally lit the fuse::

2) No wonder they're having problems, they're using Mac OS 7. Don't worry, there's a fix for that:

In more slightly bizarre Torchwood casting news, Bill Pullman will be playing 'Oswald Jones, a clever convicted murderer “boiling with lust and rage,” who becomes a celebrity after escaping a prison sentence on a technicality' (AV Club).

I foresee that storyline proceeding with Torchwood's usual grace and tact (preemptive ::facepalm::), but hey, Bill Pullman!

Commence Schwartz jokes... now.

"EW is reporting that Enver Gjokaj (Dollhouse) and Chad Michael Murray (One Tree Hill) are the frontrunners for the role of Matheson."

-- Torchwood: The New World Casting News

Chad.

Michael.

Murray.

...

...

...

BRB DED OF LULZ

Torchwood: The Lame Subtitle New World. Scroll down for the brand-spanking-new FAIL!

(This press release is ABSOLUTELY AMAZING if you imagine it as read by a movie announcer.)

( Rusty writes James Bond AU crossover badfic, accidentally makes into new series. )

"I still preferred Torchwood, though, which tried so hard and came up with some memorable episodes, of which “Small Worlds” (the one about fairies) sticks most in the mind. It was clever." -- Terry Pratchett

::HEAD ASPLODES::

...what.

MUSIC BY ABBA.

I cannot help but think that would have been AMAZING.

ZOMG EP1C SP0ILARZ!! for Torchwood: Children of Fail

BAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA

Who called it? I called it, oh yeah.

So, just read an interesting (albeit kind of old) article on Torchwood.

While I'm all against censorship, the article and comments are kind of annoying, since they seem to be along the lines of "ZOMG AMERICA SUCKS WHYYYYYY ARE THEY/WE SUCH PRUDES", which kind of misses the point that no one in America will be editing it as far as I can tell (although to be fair I have no idea what BBCA has done to past episodes, and might very well have been editing for content as well as time) -- it's being toned down by the BBC so they can attract the American market. Which means that's it's not really censorship so much as a [sacrifice of artistic integrity/change in their artistic vision] (delete whichever is inappropriate), which is a whole different kettle of fish (ALIEN fish).

Personally, I didn't really notice much of a difference in terms of risquecity between series 1 and 2. This might have had something to do with the fact that in series 1, there seemed to be an unfortunate correlation between adult content and EPIC FAIL and thus I was somewhat distracted by applying a desk directly to my forehead, mainly because it wasn't so much "adult content" as "adults channeling hormonal teenage boys content" (see also: alien date rape cologne; heterocentric sex alien and Dr. Owen "Sexual Harassment" Harper; evil lesbian alien; et cetera et cetera). Anyways, one of the reasons I theorize series 2 is less ARRGH inducing is that they didn't rely on shock value quite as much, which facilitated their increased mastery of things like PLOT and CHARACTER. That, and 100% less naked Owen.

In conclusion, I really doubt that series 3 is going to fail any harder than the other two.

However, the real point of that article is clearly the hilarious picture of Jack at the top. What happened to the rest of the Angels?